Righteous Kill Review

If I were to cage fight this film it would have been close. Although I would’ve won in the end due to a stupid plot. Have DeNiro and Pacino gone nuts or do they just not care any more? If they don’t care, why? Are they to blame? Or is the Hollywood system chewing them up and only giving them crap scripts to make? I don’t know and don’t care. I feel like spending any time on this review would be a slap into my own and the reader’s face because enough time has been wasted on this film. I like all the actors involved and I wanted to like this film. “They boys are back!” I wanted to proclaim. But then the old Hollywood switcheroo reared its useless head and I needed a nap. It starts out like a solid film. Maybe “the Departed” is holding the cop drama to a higher standard, I thought. No. The Departed was a fluke. Plus, the crazy switcheroo twist ending is like a middle-aged stripper taking off her top at some dollar-a-dance titty bar off the freeway. You know, near the Stuckeys/gas and grill. Always thinking that the audience isn’t expecting it and has never seen it. Hollywood, like the Republican party, must think that America is really stupid. Well, we are not. Good films get good box office and this piece of shit will be as relevent and realistic as a hockey-mom moose hunter fixing the nations problems. How can I care? I know Bob and Al don’t care what some out of work cable game show host thinks of their summer home mortgage payment. Even I don’t care what I think. That’s how bored I became. I told my wife I wanted to see this film and she said, “88 Minutes, my love.” With fool me twice eyes. I’m sorry I can’t do this anymore. I can’t watch two great actors do this. Like when I was a kid and Joe Namath played for the Rams. I shouldn’t judge. I could be doing bad karate at some Holiday Inn lounge when I’m 60. Hoping I get a free meal on top of the $150 I’m making for the gig. I want to Palm Strike myself in the face for not fighting Chris Mancini harder when he said, “I’ll see the Cohen Brothers movie. Graham you see “Righteous Kill.” I have no one to blame but myself. Myself and a Hockey Mom. PALM STRIKE! —Graham Elwood