Chimpanzee review

Chimpanzee is a movie made by a Disney. It’s about chimpanzees. Mostly one but I can’t say that is certain because I can’t tell chimpanzees apart because I am not a chimpanzee. Maybe I would have enjoyed this movie more if I were some sort of monkey, or if I were a human who was all about fruit and nut eating. Maybe it would have been enjoyable if I had entered the theater thinking, “Man, I hope I get to see hairy things eating over and over and over and over.” But I didn’t. So, fuck Chimpanzee.

Hot Tub Time Machine Review

From the first moment, there was a man on screen holding car keys covered in shit, I knew this was the movie for me. Many people are comparing this movie to The Hangover, which is entirely wrong. The Hangover was a piece of crap. It was a series of set ups that led to nothing. If I could have punched one movie in the face last year it would have been The Hangover for what it could have been. Hot Tub Time Machine hits all the gags it needs to, disgusting as they are at times.

Four Lions Review

Four Lions is a British movie you will probably never seen in an American movie theater because we are a fearful, stupid people. And that is sad. It is sad because Four Lions is a brilliant comedy about terrorists that completely disarms terrorism with humor. We can’t have that now, can we America?