Ah, Green Zone, the movie that finally tells us, the public, what REALLY happened with all those pesky Weapons of Mass Destruction that the Iraqi’s had stashed away in various locations. We all know they had them somewhere, even though we couldn’t find them. Oh, wait. We already know what happened about those, don’t we? Yeah, I thought so. So, no need to see this movie.
Ghost Writer is the best movie directed by a pedophile so far this year. What, too easy? Perhaps. But all kidding aside, this is a good, well crafted movie.
I had only been doing stand-up a couple of years when I saw Bill Hicks at the Funny Firm in downtown Chicago. The back of the club was filled with comics. I had heard about him but seeing him live was another experience. I remember a bit about the Devil fucking someone and creating John Davidson and Tony Robbins. I remember thinking how cool it was that I was going to quit my job waiting tables at Bacino’s on 75 East Wacker and go at stand-up full time.
As far as I’m concerned, there aren’t enough movies with dragons in them. I love the movie Excalibur. If there were any faults with the movie, it’s only that there was a lack of dragons. That movie Reign of Fire? Still needed more dragons. So luckily for me, a movie has come out that has LOTS of dragons in it. Dragonslayer? Needed more dragon. Dragonheart? Well, maybe less dragon that talks like Sean Connery and well, just less of that movie.
I loved The Runaways. In an attempt at unbiased journalism, I have to disclose that I have all of The Runaways’ albums, and “The Joan Jett Fan Club” is the only fan club I’ve ever been a member of. My membership has run out, but my enthusiasm hasn’t.
From the first moment, there was a man on screen holding car keys covered in shit, I knew this was the movie for me. Many people are comparing this movie to The Hangover, which is entirely wrong. The Hangover was a piece of crap. It was a series of set ups that led to nothing. If I could have punched one movie in the face last year it would have been The Hangover for what it could have been. Hot Tub Time Machine hits all the gags it needs to, disgusting as they are at times.
This month, in Allan Havey’s Film Vault: One of the best films ever made. It took close to forty years to gain the recognition it so richly deserves. It’s majestic, intimate and bloody. It moves slow and steady, like a train. When it reaches its destination, you will be transfixed. It single handedly redefined the western genre in film. It’s Sergio Leone’s masterpiece, Once Upon a Time in the West.
It would be hard to imagine a remake of Clash of the Titans being as cheesy as the 1981 original, with Harry Hamlin’s Lego clip-on hair style and the out-dated, but amazing Ray Harryhausen stop-motion creature animation. And indeed, this remake isn’t as cheesy, at least not in the same ways.
Oh, man. I’m about to do you all a great service. I really hope you appreciate it. After this review, don’t say I never did anything for you. Those that don’t heed my words, I wash my hands of any responsibility as of now.
If The Dark Knight had jokes it would be Kick-Ass. Yes this movie is that good. Dark Knight is one of the greatest superhero movies ever and Kick-Ass is on par. I know the trailer makes it look like a Disney film that you might watch part of if you were on a plane. The whole time thinking, “I guess this film is ok since it distracted me from the two business guys talking about boring bullshit on my flight to St. Louis, but I’m glad I didn’t spend money to see it in a theater.” Fear not my fellow nerds, this film will blow your mind.