If anyone thinks The Lone Ranger will bring back the western, they would be mistaken, unless people bring back the western just to show how much better they can make them. Not that this incarnation of the Lone Ranger is horrible, but it’s not doing the genre any big favors. As far as the Lone Ranger character, well, I can’t imagine this doing so well that they make sequels. I’m guessing we’ll be leaving the Lone Ranger well enough, alone.
If anyone thinks The Lone Ranger will bring back the western, they would be mistaken, unless people bring back the western just to show how much better they can make them. Not that this incarnation of the Lone Ranger is horrible, but it’s not doing the genre any big favors. As far as the Lone Ranger character, well, I can’t imagine this doing so well that they make sequels. I’m guessing we’ll be leaving the Lone Ranger well enough, alone.
In The Lone Ranger, we get the story of how Tonto, played by Johnny Depp, meets John Reid, played by amiable Armie Hammer, and how he becomes The Lone Ranger. Various over-the-top set pieces occur throughout. And horse shenanigans. Awards should be for Best Use of the William Tell Overture, and to the horse that plays Silver.
Ok, let’s just get on with this film’s problems. First of all, it’s over two hours long. It doesn’t need to be. Probably should have been able to tell this story in an hour and 45 minutes. It drags here and there – not aggregiously, but certainly has some filler. Secondly, the supposed funny parts aren’t particularly hilarious. I chuckled. The biggest laugh – an out-loud laugh at that – isn’t until the very last few seconds of the film. It needed more of those. And thirdly, the film seemed to swing wildly from silly antics to downright PG-13 action violence. If you think you can take your kids to this, you probably shouldn’t. They better be 13 alright. This is certainly not your parents Lone Ranger. The great William Fichtner gets to play outlaw Butch Cavendish to villainous delight, but at one point he cuts out a man’s heart and eats it. No, they don’t show it, but they do make sure you understand what’s happened. Yeah, this ain’t your usual Disney fare, it’s the fourth PG-13 rated film in their repetoire.
Now of course, that kind of thing doesn’t bother me any, but it does seem an odd contrast in a film where you see Johnny Depp’s Tonto having a light-hearted, silly scene conversing with a horse. It does make you wonder who the audience is for this. It’s a strange film in some ways, for sure. Helena Bonham Carter is in this, supposedly because Depp is and it seems there must be something in their contracts that says they have to be in at least one film together per year. She plays Red Harrington, the hooker with an ivory leg – that’s also a gun. Okie doke.
But this Lone Ranger isn’t a total loss. There are some great action sequences here with the trains. The opening sequence is pretty fun, as is the last 20 minutes of the film involving a great train chase. These are getting to be signature set pieces that director Gore Verbinski is known for. It was too much in some of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, but here they are well shot and organized for the viewer and end up being pretty satisfying. And depending on how you look at it, the classic impossibilties at work here are absurd fun. Like the revolvers with unlimited bullets, you just have to be able to choose to overlook them. It IS the Lone Ranger, after all, not a Ken Burns documentary on the trans-continental railroad.
Depp is good as Tonto, despite whether you have problems with him playing a Native American. He apparently does have some Native American in his lineage, but you could likely say that about a lot of people in America. Having a couple percent of Native American in your family tree only qualifies as a technicality. I don’t think it will unruffle any of the ruffled feathers of the complaintants. Now Armie Hammer, on the other hand, that guy is American as apple pie. Blonde, blue-ish eyes; he’s a perfect Lone Ranger. But it’s clear that they felt they needed Depp to carry him in this because he isn’t well known yet. But if this doesn’t work out, no worries. Hammer is descended from the Armand Hammer family. Occidental Petroleum and such. Owned lots of stock in the cooincidentally named Arm & Hammer company. Filthy rich white kid wants to be an actor. I guess dreams do come true. Whatever. As long as he earns it.
I don’t hate Gore Verbinski, like some people do. And I’ve certainly been on oppostie sides of his movies with people. Chris Mancini and myself are openly on opposites sides of Rango (those characters alone are so amazing!). But I concede that the second and third Pirates movies went too far. But I like Mousehunt and The Weather Man, so I won’t give up on Verbinski. And I give him credit for using a lot of big practical effects in The Lone Ranger rather than going completely CG. When they crash a train in this, they actually crash a full size train. I applaud that kind of dedication to destruction in film.
The Lone Ranger isn’t the worst film this summer, but it isn’t its’ savior either. There will surely be two camps on this one. Some people will have a lot to complain about here. Then, some people will feel it’s a big fun, brainless popcorn movie. My expectations were low so I came out of the theater not feeling like a I got robbed. Big dumb popcron movie it is. But not a great one. I’ll give it a begrudging 3 kittenhands for the opening and closing action scenes. But this is best served as a matinee or even a discount theater somewhere. It is good to see on a big screen, but thankfully it was not shot in 3D.
~ Neil T. Weakley, your average movie-goer, resting most of my summer hopes on Pacific Rim and The Wolverine.