Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the most entertaining movie of the summer. What? Too strong right out of the gate? Well, you nay-sayers, you negative nancys, you…you, people that like to be all sour-pussy about everything, can just bite me.
I can’t remember the last film I saw that was really good until about the last six minutes. Oh, wait, THIS one. Yes, really. I was hoping for sort of an Exorcist for this generation, what I got was a cliched verse from a Satanic Metal song. But not as rocking. And it’s a real shame this time, because The Last Exorcism had a lot going for it.
Robert Rodriguez’s Machete might be the best thing to happen to Mexicans in film in a long time. Or the worst thing, depending on your sense of humor. It is, however, one of the summer’s most fun movies without a doubt. No, I still liked Piranha 3-D better, but this is still up there. With its’ over the top violence, retro 70’s flavor, and all star cast that plays along; for my pesos, it’s hard to go wrong.
When I see a movie titled “Devil”, you’ve already got my attention. But when I find out the story is written by M. Night Shyamalan, I am wary, as I, or anyone, should be. As you know, we give M. Night a lot of shit around here. And I’ll be honest, after Signs, I had my doubts. And hey, I even liked Unbreakable, where many others did not. And it it weren’t for the glaring plot hole in Signs, I might have stayed on board with that one.
It’s hard to imagine someone being able to make a movie that features only one character onscreen for the whole 90 plus minutes and actually being able to make it work, let alone just watchable. Oh, sure, I could watch Natalie Portman do her nails for 90 minutes, or Megan Fox sunbathe. Hell, I even love the movie Babe. 90 minutes of a talkin’ pig? I’m in. But a movie about a guy buried alive in a coffin? Really?
Oh, Wes Craven, where is your Nightmare On Elm Street, your Scream, your Serpent and the Rainbow? They are gems of the past. It would seem all we’re left with in the present is My Money -uh, Soul, To Take. Oh, sure, it looks good, and there’s some good mis-direction, but where is the horror?
What is there to really say here? It’s not like you don’t know what the Hell this film is about. Johnny Knoxville and his band of knuckleheads do more horrifyingly disturbing things to each other for the amusement (and horror) of others. Any questions? I didn’t think so.
I love monster movies. Love ’em. Been a Godzilla fan since I was a mid single-digit child. I was watching some kind of monster movie when my mom kicked my dad out of the house for good. If there was a film with a monster, giant or otherwise, I’d watch it. And I still do.
Ladies and gentleman, ghouls and gravediggers, undead and dead alike, welcome to another wrap-up of Shriekfest! 2010 was a pretty good year, all things considered. First off, I’d like to say that I really like Shriekfest. I have a great time there and I usually make time to see just about everything.
Somebody asked me how a movie about a guy that saws his arm off isn’t a plot only worth five minutes. My question would be, how could you think it only needs five minutes?! A man CUTS HIS OWN ARM OFF. How could you not want to know more about this?